Today I bathe in regret.  Over so many things that I "could have, should have." They have been piling and piling for quite awhile..  Finally when you let them pile high enough, the hope of fixing all the messed up stuff seems unlikely. I don't feel hopeless, just overwhelmed by my own failure and inability to do anything right sometimes, it seems. I can't even say that I really know the right way to walk right now.  I want to walk uprightly.  I don't know that I know what that means anymore. I don't know the difference anymore between "prophetic" or just speaking what already is over somebody. So many things that just don't make any sense to me at all right now. So I guess my prayer right now, is "Sorry God, please break in."